Letters to God

By Bev Condy

May I write You letters God

To tell You how I feel?

May I put on paper

The thoughts that are so real?

The tears that seem to flow-

Am I telling You something new

Or do You already know?

The ache that's surging in my heart

To say with ink and pen

That You know my every care,

Are these just letters that I write 

Or do You call it prayer?

I pray for people that are not as kind

Dear God 

I pray for you and everyone in heaven
I hope that they are just as happy as I am 
I pray that one day we can all get along and be happy together
I pray for people that are not as kind that they become closer to you and everyone around them
I pray for people that have less or nothing that they can still be happy even though they don't have what they need
I'm thankful for what I have and what I will receive in the future

Amen

Dear God

Dear God,
Please give me the awareness and strength to make healthier decisions.Before a meal, give me the awareness to know what I should and shouldn’t eat.Throughout the day, give me the strength to exercise and stay fit.Never let me forget that my body and mind are one,And I must take care of both.
Amen

Thank you

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. – William Arthur Ward

New discoveries

My journey is strengthened everyday as I read how other people live their lives in a positive way. It also encourages me to read more, which I have always loved and enjoy, but find it more fulfilling this time around because I'm reading in (re)search of self.

I learn everyday...

“Humility is perfect quietness of heart. It is to expect nothing, to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised. It is to have a blessed home in the Lord, where I can go in and shut the door, and kneel to my Father in secret, and am at peace as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and above is trouble.” 
― Andrew Murray

I took things for granted...

I TOTALLY RELATE...

This piece is by Celestine Chua, from www.tinybuddha.com/blog

How often do you pause to appreciate what you have in life?

When I was young, I took things for granted. I believe many other kids did so, as well. After all, we were young and we didn't know what life could be like on the other side.

One thing we took for granted was education. In my country, it’s compulsory for all kids to go to school, so it was a given. We never thought about how lucky we were to be educated.

We also took our teachers for granted. We never thought about how lucky we were to have teachers who cared for our growth so much, and poured their heart and soul into their lessons.

Then slowly as I grew up, I began to appreciate things around me more. As I saw more and more of the world out there, I realized all the things I’d been given are not rights, but privileges.

I realized that being literate is a not a right, but a gift. I realized there is a lot of war and violence in the world, and I’m lucky to live in a country where it’s safe and peaceful. I realized there are people out there who don’t have their five senses, and to have mine is a gift.

I realized the world is so beautiful, and we’re lucky to live in such an amazing world.

Sometimes it’s easy to feel bad because you’re going through a tough time in life. However, remember that no matter how bad your situation may seem, there are tens of thousands of things to be grateful for in life.

Below is a simple list of things that I’m grateful for in my life. Most of the items, if not all, will apply to you too. I’m sure as you read this list, you’ll think of many more things to be grateful for. Feel free to add on in the comments box below. I would love to read them.

Here are ten things to be grateful for in our lives:

1. Your family – for being your closest kin in the world.
2. Your friends – for being your companions in life.
3. Your mind - for the ability to think, to store memories, and to create new solutions.
4. Fears – so you know your opportunities for growth.
5. Pain – for you to become a stronger person.
6. Animals – for adding to the diversity of life.
7. Books – for adding wisdom into your life.
8. Time – for a system to organize yourself and keep track of activities.
9. Laughter - for serenading your life with joy.
10. Love - for letting you feel what it means to truly be alive.

Bonus: You.

For being who you are and touching the world with your presence.

Peace is...

“Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace.” 
― Milan Kundera

Good morning

My favourite quote:

“Let the first act of every morning be to make the following resolve for the day:
- I shall not fear anyone on Earth. 
- I shall fear only God. 
- I shall not bear ill will toward anyone. 
- I shall not submit to injustice from anyone. 
- I shall conquer untruth by truth. And in resisting untruth, I shall put up with all suffering.” 
― Mahatma Gandhi

“Don't Gain The World & Lose Your Soul, Wisdom Is Better Than Silver Or Gold.” 
― Bob Marley

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” ― Martin Luther King Jr

Every single day you make a choice

www.positivityblog.com

10 SIMPLE THINGS YOU CAN BE GRATEFUL FOR, EVEN WHEN TIMES ARE TOUGH 
By Henrik Edberg

“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Some days are just great. Things go as planned or even better and you bounce from meetings to tasks to your private life and you feel wonderful on the inside.

Then there are other days.

Days when you do not feel much motivated at all. When your best laid plans go out the window before the day has barely begun.

When something important unexpectedly goes wrong and you get that sinking feeling in your stomach. Or when you feel sorry for yourself and honestly just want to go back to bed and to sleep again.

Maybe the simplest and certainly one of the most effective ways to turn such a day, week or month around into something more positive and better is in my experience to turn your focus to gratitude.

Because even if things look tough today or for the next 3 or 6 months I can always find something or several things to feel very grateful for about my life.

So I’d like to share a small list of 10 simple, fundamental things that I feel grateful for. I usually only reflect on one or a few of these things when I need to but I thought a list like this one could be helpful both for you and for me.

Maybe not every item on this list works in your life, then take what works from here and create and add to put together your own list.

1.  A roof over my head and a warm home
I live in Sweden, a country where the winters are cold and snowy and the fall and often spring can be quite rainy. So I often return to this one.

Few things feel better than to reflect upon having warm home and a roof over my head when it is cold and windy outside and I can hear the rain beating hard on my window.

2.  Plenty of drinkable water
I love water and drink plenty of it every day. It is certainly something I take for granted from time to time. But it is not a given. 780 million people lack access to safe drinking water according to water.org.

3.  I don’t have to go hungry
Plus, most of things I cook and/or eat are quite tasty and healthy. And sometimes they are simply wonderful. So I have much to be grateful for when it comes to food.

4.  I can enjoy the small and free pleasures of life
A sunrise.
A relaxing walk in the woods.
A cool swim in the ocean.
A crisp Autumn day when the trees are filled with leaves of vibrant and spectacular colors.
The sun warming my face after many days of the sky being filled with dreary, gray clouds.

5.  Access to the internet
When I was really young back in the 80’s and 90’s and you wanted to learn about something then you had to ask someone who may have had spotty knowledge. Or you had to visit the local library and maybe there was a book or magazine about it.

Things are so different now and even though it is just a part of everyday life it still amazing.

I can learn about pretty much anything online. I can add new skills and habits to make my life happier and more awesome with the help of what other people share online.

And there is the opportunity to connect with and get to know people from all around the world.

6.  My friends and family
For the love, support, kindness and all the fun that they offer and I get to offer them.

7.  My health
I do not have the indestructible body of Superman. But if I treat it well and get plenty of sleep, work out and eat healthy then it works really wonderfully well almost all the time.

Sure, I get sick sometimes. But overall I have very, very much to be thankful for that I often take for granted about my body and how it helps me to do everything – see, listen, walk, write, hug, kiss, think and experience my world – every day.

8.  The kindness of people I have never met before
Every day I get kind and supportive emails and messages from people all around the world that I have never met but who reads my blog or newsletters. Their expressions of gratitude make my life happier and help me when things feel tough.

And I truly appreciate the simple kindness in the rest of my daily life too when people let me skip ahead of them in the checkout line in the store when I only have a few items. When they stay for a few seconds and hold up the door for me too. Or let me into their lane when I drive.

9.  The setbacks that have formed me and made me stronger
I have been really ill a few times in my life and these experiences has made me stronger mentally and given me the gift of being very appreciative of modern medicine and of my own body and taking good care of it.

Last year was in a way the toughest one yet for my business as the number of visitors to my website via Google went down in big, big leaps month after month. That has changed in a very positive way over these last few months but 2013 really helped me to work harder and smarter than ever. And it has made me more appreciative than ever of the opportunity I have with what I do here.

10. I am alive
I have like everyone else been in situations where an accident and being in the wrong place for just a few seconds could have meant I would not have been here anymore.

If I had been born in another time or in another place then there is a big chance that I would not have been here to experience my 33rd birthday. But I am here now. I have this moment and day and hopefully many days still to experience and live my life. It is an amazing thing!

What do you feel grateful for even when you might be going through a tough day or time?

Please share with me your appreciations below or even via the email link on this page

This has got to be shared!

Today I laughed until my stomach was sore.

See here's why...

Please cut and paste the link below if video does not play.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XFBUM8dMqw#t=176

Special people are born in January on the 18th

I know I did something good in life. I gave birth to the most wonderful, caring, kind, beautiful, amazing person in the whole world that I know - my T-man. Lovie, I can't believe you’re 31 years old today!

31 year ago today, they placed you in my arms. I became a teenage mother, bewitched by all your charms.

You learned to walk, to read, each day brought something new. Your first words, colour-naming, your first dream, I remember it so vividly, you were 2-years old. You said I was running through the fields, and you wanted to know why… Up to this day, I can’t make it out.

Throughout the years my lovely, you hurt, I cried, you grew. Sometimes you didn't need me, didn't want to hold my hand. Your independence made you proud, but made me a little sad. Why did time go so fast? A few more moments please...

In your struggle to be free, sometimes we don't get along, but I'm always on your side. I'll always be your mom. You can't stop time, can't hold it back. The good person that you are, fills my heart with pride. In my eyes there is no one like you. My pride and joy, I love you.

Happy birthday to you my lovely, so kind a child you are, I can't believe you're mine.

I miss you madly

Hey sisi.
I miss you so much. Tomorrow is T's birthday...
Looking back, I know I wouldn't have made it if I didn't have you in my life. You were only 9 years old then, but you were my best friend, my confidant and my support. I thank God for your existence. I love you to the moon.

Friday oh my Friday

"It doesn’t really matter where you are. It doesn’t even really matter if you work or not. When Friday rolls around, moods start to lift, smiles start to appear and the stresses endured during the week begin to disappear. Today, I’m grateful for Friday." Unknown

Fix my home

Below is the motivation to win a room refurbishment prize for a home

MOTIVATION: #FIX MY HOME

The kitchen will be next

Background:

It all started in 2005 when I bought my townhouse. I bought it from an old lady who was moving into an old-age care facility and had owned the townhouse for thirty years then (now 39 years old). The structure was still strong including most of the fitting but outdated. As a new and excited home owner, of course I started refurbishing starting with the master bedroom and the bathroom – which up to this day I’m still proud of. Slowly but surely, the other rooms followed (three bedrooms, lounge, dining area, kitchen and a granny flat (more like a helper’s quarters) – furniture, painting, etc. As a freelancer, it was not always good, sometime there’ll be money, sometimes not, but the work continued whenever the funds were available. That took about five years. At the time my son was at varsity, unfortunately for me, I was one of those single parents who unable to make provision for their kids’ education. I was a single mom, I had Tebogo when I was 17, needless to say – not planned. His dad owned a pair of Nikes (ran away)…

If there’s one thing that I’m proud of thought is that my garden is stunning! Every plant and grass in my garden is picked and planted by yours truly! My pride..

As the saying goes, “the kitchen will be next”, I kept fixing everything else and overlooking the kitchen…

Recession:

In 2010, things went haywire, the industry was (as any other business) hit by recession. I believe the small businesses and the freelancers where the most hard-hit. I could not afford to pay for anything including my bond repayments and could not carry on with the home refurbishments. Luckily my son was graduating in that year – one less issue, hallelujah! I had to come up with a plan or face losing my only investment – my HOME!

Plan:

Rent out property for a while and look for cheaper accommodation, while at that, maybe a change of scenery will do me good. So I started looking towards Durban, for the simple reason that I hated it, but I had to find out why I hated it. The only way to find out was to move there. Got the tenants. Got the accommodation. Packed my dog Oddy and cat Mini and we were off on a road trip to the unknown! By then of course Tebogo had a good job at Investec and was earning a salary, so I was comfortable leaving him behind to start a life of his own.

Cut a long story short:

Durban was difficult (dah!) and unpleasant. No work! So I found myself contacting my Joburg clients, but of course not telling them that I’m in Durban. They would call for work and ask to see me for a job, and I would insist on the next day. I would book a flight then, only get back to them about the time based on my travelling. So it became a “me living in Durban and working in Joburg” kinda scenario… Again, needless to say, taxing too mush (much). Until I committed to this job which required me to be there (here/Joburg for three months at a time) and I eventually had to make a decision that the Durban thing is not working and I needed to move back home.

Ooh! Ze dilemma (the dilemma):

The landlord could not hear of it! – that I was leaving the premises before my lease had expired. I tried to negotiate and make up forever, huh! Nothing came of it until the lawyers had to be involved to this stage. So being back in Jozi, I still could not afford to move back to my house. I lost my car (the cambelt (sp) expired, engine blew up, and it was too expensive for me to tow it to Joburg to be fixed (let alone). I had to sell it for below the market rate to an Indian (no disrespect intended) for waaaay less than the market rate. Landlord kept all of my life’s worth claiming landlord abuse (not sure if it’s the right term) – it’s been four years now. I had to start from scratch buying furniture, and making do with stuff donated by family – from the bed…

Yey! I see (ze) the light now…:

Back in Joburg, I have tenants in my house and things are getting better for me financially and all. I now have this semi-permanent job and I have a semi-stable salary. By 2013 end I feel that I could be ready to move back to my home, I‘m renting a room at Samantha’s in Glenhazel and I’m giving myself eight months (that’s when my tenants’ lease expires) to move back to Liddesdale. Plans in place, Oddy and Mini all excited! The time comes – can I say “FUCK!”. My place is a hell hole! The kitchen is the worst! The little (new) gas stove that I bought before moving out is retarded – in many ways. Only two plates of the four plates are functional. Oven is not working. The newly painted (as in 2010) ceiling is black from burn smoke, the walls are a disaster, the cupboards handles are hanging, the plugs are falling apart.

I’m actually crying as I write this. It hasn’t been easy, I fought all the way through to make it to this point (which is better from worst – not from where I left off). See pictures attached for my once lovely kitchen in waiting…

The kitchen is next:

At this stage, the kitchen is next come hail or high water, the kitchen is next! Since I moved back in October 2014, I have been getting quotations. I managed to get a blind in, new (black and white) floor tiles, a working fridge, an old washing machine (donated, hoping to fix it), a dryer (not working either, donated too), an unhealthy dishwasher, gas pipes hanging (not working, unsafe – see images attached)  electric wires hanging (not working, unsafe – see images attached). My outdated cupboards with rust, no stove (had to resort to buying a two plate stove just to make do). Thank goodness the only functional thing in my kitchen is my fridge.

2015:

At 48 years old, I have decided to go back to school full time this year, I will be studying Bachelor of Arts in Digital Marketing through Rosebank College. Thank goodness to my job, I can pay for my fees. But that means the kitchen is still next in line after my degree. At this rate I’m looking at 2018 to make that happen. I’m not even talking about fancy, just functional kitchen.

Please help me #Fix my home. The kitchen really has to be next, this time around.

Please wish me well.

Comments are always welcome.

Giving it the "Old college try"

iStock

AT THE AGE OF 48, I FEET IT IS REALLY RIGHT TO TAKE THIS LIFE-CHANGING STEP FOR MYSELF, EVENTUALLY.

I want to get an advanced degree for self-improvement to better equip myself with the tools I need to remain current in my field of work. I believe it's never too late to believe and never too late to dream.

The motivation for this article is that I’m going back to college in a few days’ time - eek! Needless to say, I’m filled with anxiety, excitement and all sorts of panic all at once. I think it is enriching to be able to meet people of various ages and experiences and to connect with young people. 

One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to believe you’re too old. Too old for what? For living your life more fully? For daring to “be what you might have been”? Absolutely not! My main anxiety is going to school with kids half my age. So what if I haven’t set foot in a classroom in 25 years? I understand that I might be the oldest student in the class, but as long as I apply myself, it shouldn't be an issue - right? I believe I can learn something from everyone, and everyone has something they can learn from everyone, regardless of age.

Recently I came across this article about late bloomers, people who had not found their calling until after age 40. As a late bloomer myself, I found it intriguing. So I thought I’d do a little research and create a short list of things for people who did their “blooming” after age 40 should look out for.

So, if you're going back to school as an adult, your life is about to become just a little tougher. When you were in school before, you were younger, you cared a little less and believe it or not, your brain was set up to absorb new information more easily. But, going back to school as an adult doesn't have to be all that tough. Adult students returning to school can find fitting in stressful, maybe even a little intimidating. It doesn't have to be. I'm going to tell you some things you'll really need to know to be successful in school as an adult (this goes for me too).

• Let your experience shine. Remember that you have a lot to bring to the table, "old" is a completely relative term. You may feel old at 30, but to that 53-year-old student sitting across the room, you belong to the younger crowd, and to the person who could be in their eighties, you’re still a kid. Age is in the eye of the beholder, not to mention the heart. 

• Be supportive of your classmates. They're probably young and this really is their first rodeo. Help them out, but only if they ask.

• Don't judge. Everyone already does, don't add to their burden.

• Keep an open mind, everyone has something to teach you. The experience you bring to the classroom because of your age is part of what makes you such a bonus, no matter what level it's at.

• Don't try to be buddies with the teacher. Just because you’re the same age as the teacher, or quite possibly older, resist the normal temptation to buddy up to him or her. A friendship with your teacher should be like any other relationship - natural.

• Get your family on board. Going back to school will be easier if you have a supportive family, so make sure to discuss your plans with your spouse or partner and your children if you have them.

I hope this information helps to make my (and yours) journey a little bit lighter. I will do my best to follow my own advise and I'm looking forward to mine and hope that I come out sane on the other side (three years later). 

Please feel free to share if you have any similar experience. But also, here's wishing the best to all of you who are going through the same journey as me.

Your comments are always welcome.

Happy Tuesday

Today, take a few minutes to sit quietly and just be thankful for all that you have.

This movie made my day...

An aging rock star (Moore) and a contemporary art dealer (Coogan) - Susanna and Beale are too self-involved even to notice their neglect and inadequacy as parents; their fight for Maisie is just another battle in an epic war of personalities. As they raise the stakes by taking on inappropriate new partners, the ex-nanny Margo and the much younger bartender Lincoln (Vanderham and Skarsgård), the shuffling of Maisie from household to household becomes more and more callous, the consequences more and more troubling. Always watchful, however, Maisie begins to understand that the path through this morass of adult childishness and selfish blindness will have to be of her own making.

WHAT MAISIE KNEW tells the story of a captivating little girl's struggle for grace in the midst of her parents' bitter custody battle. Told through the eyes of the title's heroine, Maisie navigates this ever-widening turmoil with a six-year-old's innocence, charm and generosity of spirit.

"The most remarkable performance I've ever seen by a child of this age" NPR

If you have a moment, get this movie it is romantic and yet sad, with a happy ending twist - love it! Also available in a book.

Please share your comments below. 

My lovely Sunday

... a dog and a cat.
I hope you're having a relaxed Sunday.

Happy Sunday!

I'm feeling thankful today.

It was great to see you all on Saturday for dinner, thank you for the gifts. It was so nice to catch up and hopefully it won't be too long before I see you again.

Much love,

Pinky, Tebogo, Oddy and Mini

Jacqui, Veli, Samantha, Maya and Susanne

Comments are always welcome below.

The Golden Years

My lovely mom on her 74th birthday.

I'm glad I didn't have to make a choice for my mom to go to a retirement community, at the age of 74, she is/we are fortunate enough that she's still able to make sane, independent decisions - mostly with our support of course.

As we grow older buying a retirement home can be one of the most important decisions to make. It should be a step that assures us of contentment and dignity in the years ahead. The "Golden Years" should be just that, years of enjoying the rewards of a lifetime of hard work. This is the time when adults get time for fun - I believe!

Unfortunately though, most of the retirees tend to put off even thinking about the move to an old age home, simply because they can’t face the fact that they're getting older.

My peace of mind: My mom has suffered two strokes and has a history of several chronic health issues. Retirement communities are very good about employing staff with health care experience. Staff members are on site to help the residents bathe, administer medications and check blood pressure, pulse rate and other vital signs, making sure that health comes first for their residents.

Abundant social opportunities and activities: Although you are retired, there are plenty of things to do. Many active retirement communities have activities, including anything from aerobics, bingo, golf to tennis. Most retirement communities also host tournaments and other social events for the residents to interact with each other.

Healthy delicious meals every day: At least one meal per day is usually included in the monthly fee. Residents might enjoy breakfast and lunch in their apartment, but having a dining room with ample selection of nutritious meals every evening, means no worries about what to prepare for dinner. Dietary staff at the retirement home ensures that seniors always have nutritious, freshly prepared meals every day. Most retirement residences can accommodate special diets as well.

Fitness and wellness: It’s becoming a standard across the nation to include a fitness center, spa facilities and even hair-salons on the premises. You’ll not only enjoy fitness tailored to your needs as a senior but you may even meet a few new friends.  

Transportation services: Trips to the mall, grocery shopping and medical appointments are standard offerings within most senior living communities. 

Security: A well-run retirement complex will prioritise the security of its residents.

Family concerns: I feel that I may not always be there in an emergency, whereas in a retirement complex someone is on call 24 hours a day - some peace of mind there.

Remember – at this stage of your (old-age) life, the greatest gift a parent can give a child is that parent’s own independence.

Here's wishing the best of luck, love and laughter to my mom - Nonzwakazi Rapitsi. Well done to a brave and independent step you took. We will always be there for support all the time.

Comment are always welcome, please take a moment to share your experiences and gratitude with us below or by email.